Friday, September 01, 2006

My Big Fat Greek Upset



Final score at the semifinals of the Men's Basketball World Championships tonite:

Greece 101 USA 95

I have only one thing to say to the US team.

Who's your Papa(dopolous)!!?

I was raised by Greeks. My first words were Greek. I can still sing the Greek national anthem by heart. My mother's maiden name was Yiannacopolous (just try to remember the correct spelling of that name on a credit application).

So this is kind of cool even though I'm a lifelong American baller and fan and I'm sort of bummed we got knocked out again.

How did we lose?

Well, we couldn't play D and couldn't shoot. And there were more throwdowns among the Greeks than at any time since Zeus got major airtime back in the classical day. No fakin' the funk on the Grecian dunks! Air Yianni! We got schooled on the pick and roll like Plato on his first day with Socrates.

But, hey, I know the Greeks. I lived in Greece at one time for 3 months.

These are the people who beat us:

Kickin' Booty And Takin' Names Later

** Their macho presidential palace guards wear frou frou skirts and little fuzzy balls on the end of their slippers!

** Most Greeks are little swarthy people. I mean, really little...

** These people are so kicked back that most of 'em work about 2, maybe 3 hours a day. Professional athletes work longer hours than your average Athenian.

** Outside of Athens, donkeys and goats are a Greek's best friend.

** When they like a singer they throw their dinner plates onstage and smash them around the performer's feet. I'm not joking. What's that about? :^)

** They drink warm goat's milk with chunks in it for God's sake!

In light of all that, I think we can take only one path back to the top of the international hoops world.

Immigration and naturalization.

3 Comments:

Blogger 3wishes said...

Thanks for the picture, my daughter has been stumped for an idea. She choreographs for the local high school marching band's color guard. I think you may have solved her latest dilema....."how can I make the half-time show hilarious yet unique?" :^)(esp the fuzzy poms)

3:32 PM  
Anonymous Jon said...

Greeks won cause they are veterans who have spent tons of time playing together. American stars have the weird issue of being too good to play together consistently (they're with their other teams too much, and there's so much competition at the top that there's tons of turnover among the best players). I honestly don't know how it'll be any different - the USA will always have the most talented ballers, but no matter what they do I think they'll continue to lost occasionally in international competition.

I was sad when the Greeks didn't win the whole thing.

1:18 AM  
Blogger Wordcat said...

Yeah, me too. I had a boastful 'whose your Papadakis?' post ready if they won. Oh well, maybe I can use it next year....

2:02 PM  

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